FIRST TRIAL.

[eggmobile]

[Eventually, when you are all gathered, the elevator jerks. Not in some Rod Serling Theme Park ride manner, but much more creaky. The elevator glides upwards, incredibly far up, before coming to a stop at a room you’ve never seen before.]

[The room shares a similar aesthetic to the control center, each portion of the wall covered in television monitors. They all display a bright blue screen at the moment, save for twenty additional monitors hanging from the ceiling like chandeliers. Each of those display the face of the good Doctor Eggman.

The only furnishings in the room are a table and chairs - the table is excessively long enough to seat all of you at the moment. Every chair corresponds to a different room, and each is marked with a nameplate corresponding to the room’s occupant. The unoccupied rooms are unmarked save for numbers, with no nameplates at all. Wilkins’ empty chair bares both his name, and a very ominous coffee scent.

In front of each chair are very small microphones kept in stands, just in case you need to speak up, as well as keyboards built into the table.

Once you are all seated, Doctor Eggman speaks.]

Now that you’ve all gathered, here are the rules! You must discuss the crime, and once you believe you have figured out your culprit, you may input their name in the keyboard in front of you! Take all the time you need, of course.

Failure to vote will result in your execution, and the same will follow should you fail to identify the culprit! How does that sound to you all?

Comments

[clawhands]

HEY! We didn't agree to these terms, egg-boy! You just said that if someone got away with the crime, they'd become part of the Legion!

[eggmobile]

Did you agree to those terms?

[umslay]

Oh, goodie.

[Of course there's some sort of catch. He did say only one of them could join. The Magician rests his elbows on the table and props his head up. At least he's got the right clothing for talking about a dead guy.]

I was busy this whole time. What happened?

[clawhands]

The Coffee Puppet was murdered by someone.

[Bad Cop pulls something out of his pocket--a small LEGO chair and brandishes it at the person sitting closest to him.]

It could be any one of you! We can either do this the easy way or the hard way!

[gangplankgalleon]

[hand raise:]

What are the rules abooouuuuttt napping?

[madmadam]

[Already asleep and snoring very loudly.]

[masterbreaker]

HEY! I’ve got a question!

[He speaks loud into the microphone on his table. Maybe he’s standing on something to even reach it, but once the attention is on him, he frowns.]

I’ve got a question who the heck was that guy found in the foyer? has anybody ever seen him before?

[clawhands]

I don't think so. I don't think he was mentioned in any of the bios in the foyer, either.

[Bad Cop frowns, grimacing.]

Hey! Eggman! Where'd this guy come from in the first place, anyway?

[liv_nye_the_science_pi]

I suspect-

[Liv's just. Got a severed arm wrapped up in a torn lab coat. She sets it on the table.]

-and this has yet to be confirmed by anything, mind- that he was some sort of host for the departed frog. I don't know how he was camouflaged all this time, but it may have something to do with the way that coffee kept appearing from nowhere.

cw: severed limbs?

[liv_nye_the_science_pi]

Do we have to find the CORRECT culprit, or just A culprit.

[Directed at Eggman, as she glides in on her tentacle-arms.]

[Well, on a few of them. One's still being used to nurse the cold mug of coffee.]

And whoever did this did so with excessive brute force, with one exception.

[She holds up the bloody remains of her own lab coat, now wrapped around a human arm.]

The frog was torn to shreds, but this- it was attached to him somehow, like it was using him as a puppet- was cut very cleanly.

[conditionally]

I'd think that'd take a great deal of power to rip off a limb, but cleanly? What does that suggest, that someone had a knife or something?

[neednoaccuser]

And I'm assuming you didn't, uh. Find the rest of that body?

catherd?

[clawhands]

...Alright. So, let's try and establish a timeline and figure out who could've been responsible for this.

[He crosses his arms, frowning.]

The culprit went into the kitchen at night--possibly to eat a midnight snack, as evident by the things taken from the refrigerator. I don't think Wilkins would've wanted anything to eat beyond coffee.

Speaking of coffee, someone was making a pot of coffee and had poured themselves a nice cup of it. We don't know if the coffee itself was Wilkins or not, at this point.

Don't think we could've told, anyways--never actually got a chance to try it. [Bad Cop grimaces.] Wilkins probably showed up afterwards, and for some reason or another, the person attacked him, or Wilkins attacked them. I'm thinking more the latter because the pot shattered on the ground--maybe they were in the middle of pouring or something. A struggle ensued, and the puppet was torn apart, as evident by the mouthplate and eye that had been tossed aside. Blood was spilled, as well, and...the strange bearded man must've appeared as his arm was being torn off, killing Wilkins. The man must've crawled away, and then died.

[He pauses.]

...I still think it's the dude who's always screaming.

[umslay]

...Do you think Dennis has the strength to chop a man's arm off with a kitchen knife?

By they way, what was the weapon for that? Did anyone find a bloody sharp edge?

[tedioustrivium]

I can't scream, I don't have a mouth.

Re: catherd?

[liv_nye_the_science_pi]

The frog had expressed a belief that sooner or later, people who refused to drink the coffee would suffer from some kind of- quasi-religous reckoning. It's entirely possible it attacked the culprit for drinking another brand of coffee.

[startercar]

Reasonably react to provocation one time and everyone assumes you're a murderer. Real classy, you degenerates.

[gangplankgalleon]

Ho-ho! So you think simply because of some old mush between my teeth that I’m sort of felon! Bah! I’ve never heard such slimy slander in my life! And against ROYALTY! I simply won’t stand for it!

If you wish to come at the king, then build yourself a stronger case than one built off hearsay, or you’ll regret your decision immensely!

[MACHINEGUN TALK BATTLE START!]

[neednoaccuser]

Can we just shoot him or something? This is so unnecessary.

[madmadam]

Big talk from a pair of boots.

[umslay]

My, what sharp teeth you have, Mr. Rool!

[conditionally]

If you've got a better idea, I'm sure we'd like to hear it.

[clawhands]

Tell it to the executioner, you big baby!

Wait, you're royalty?

[Ignores the crown on his head.]

VOTING

[eggmobile]

...well, that was - erm. Yes. Something.

Input your votes when you are ready! Should your votes be correct, you will live to fight another day! If not,we’ll...beat hope you get this right!

(ooc: assuming the majority of the votes are correct, an execution toplevel will be posted in the morning!)

[umslay]

[He can't believe his hunch was correct; The Magician is dressed for success and he can finally leave this room for actual work.]

King K Rool

So, ah, what happens next?

EXECUTION: Crocodile Cacophony

[eggmobile]

Well done, well done! I’m delighted you were able to put your peabrains together and form some sort of coherent thoughts! As a reward for your troubles - senseless violence!

[A red curtain obscures the table for a moment, completely blocking your view. After a moment, the curtain comes up, revealing that K. Rool has disappeared from your numbers. He has reappeared on the table, dazed and confused. The table has been made up as well, acting as a stage, and currently appearing as what appears to be a nostalgic-looking boxing ring.

K. Rool looks incredibly satisfied with the development, attempting to rouse applause with cries of “YEAH! THANK YOU!” These arrogant cries are quickly silenced as an unseen light drops onto his head, knocking his crown off and to the side.

The light impacts his skull, leaving him bleeding and dazed. He stumbles forward...straight into another part of the stage, made to look like a mad scientist’s lab. K. Rool walks into a electric pole, shocking him, and frying him.

In a cartoon daze, he is smacked by a gigantic cannonball that shoots from across the room. The cannonball smashes his stomach armor, leaving that gold stomach completely broken. The shards fall to the table with every slight movement from him, exposing a fleshy belly and leaving him whimpering in pain. He falls to the ground.

Dead.

...or is he? K. Rool opens one eye, revealing he’s still alive. He looks around very quickly.

A large statue of a monkey with a necktie falls down from a compartment in the ceiling. Roughly the size of K. Rool himself, the statue drops down at sickening speed, crushing K. Rool’s skull completely and sending his...headstuff to shoot outwards from pressure.

Now he’s dead. How’s that for a gameover?]

Leave this place at once! You may have some time to rest, and consider your options going forward...

[umslay]

[Oh. Oh.. This is far more gruesome than what he's used to. The Magician thanks everything that he can shield his eyes with the brim of his hat when the gore becomes excessive.]

Certainly a deterrent to failure.